Well I can tell what my eye didn’t see, and that’s enough of Jessica Alba scantly clad in this movie.

Machine Girl is the latest in a long blood-soaked line of Japanese gore movies that have recently been an obsession for me. Given the fact that it stars a Japanese schoolgirl (naturally) with a Gatling gun for an arm, how could I possibly pass this one up? There are not many surprises to be found while watching it, however, there were some great moments during this film.

Chanbara Beauty or as it is sometimes known Oneechanbara, is the next in the seemingly long line of Japanese Gore flix that I made myself suffer through. At least for my sake the movie was much better than the game.

Meatball Machine is not so much about “Meatballs” or “Machinery” as it is a timeless love story. A love story between two regular people, set in a land where it’s perfectly normal to have “Power Ranger” type monsters running around fighting each other. So basically it’s an average day in Japan I guess.

This movie will haunt you in your dreams, for all of the wrong reasons. Seriously if this is “your kinda movie” you need to get your head checked.